BY: CRAIG BRUMMER
Watching the Super Bowl just the other day, I could not help myself from being amused by the subject matter of the commercials. The halftime show itself is a topic of discussion. I'm not sure how humorous this is going to be, but if you are at all amused by the irony of the state of our culture, read on.
From a holistic view of the string of commercials that ran throughout the evening, one could quite quickly pick up a thematic pattern: sex, cars, beer, soda, sex, cars, beer, soda, and so on. By the end of the evening, I smiled as I realized that I had just witnessed the essence of American culture boiled down to a nice, thick syrup. Sex, cars, beer, soda... and football. Maybe I'm the only one who finds that funny.
The halftime show was an event in and of itself, that's for sure. At the ripe young age of 53, Madonna stood in as an icon of the American music industry. As she managed to incorporate LMFAO, MIA, Cee-Lo, and even a tight-rope dancer, Madonna took the theme of the commercials to heart. The fact that she entered in a very goddess-like fashion was no surprise. The only surprises came when the poor old woman tried some sort of calisthenics. The guy from LMFAO had to make sure not to break her hip as he held her foot in that awkward push-up move she attempted.
But the halftime show was not just a resurrection of all the things Israel did wrong in the Old Testament. There was hope. America may rest assured of Madonna's final goal in life: WORLD PEACE. While not even Jesus claimed to bring peace to the world, but the sword, we can surely remain confident in the ability of the entertainment industry to save us from the internal and external wars we all encounter.
Madonna's ultimate goal in life will only arrive, though, when all of humanity finally submits to kneeling down and kissing that glorious, 7 pound, sterling silver ido... I mean trophy! What a captivating sight it was to see that trophy process through the crowd. Now if only the whole country could unite in this idolat... I mean athletic enterprise, all would be well. I could only laugh in confusion.
All in all, the halftime show garnered more viewers than the actual game. The commercials were the primary attraction to a large portion of those who watched the game in its entirety. And in the end, Coca-Cola was the only name that managed to piece together a cohesive story, and they even encouraged a little bit of silence. God forbid. As bitter as I may sound, I'm actually not. For me, those three hours were pure entertainment and amusement, just not as originally intended.